A fierce familial spat happened within the Buckingham Palace sometime back when Prince Harry let his father and grandmother know that he was planning to pick up a job after graduation. An irate Prince Charles severely admonished Harry for planning to break the royal tradition of not lifting up even a tiny finger to do anything in life. The Queen, angered by the news, wished to scream at her grandson but since she was too lazy to do that she hired comedian Michael Richards to do the job. However, Michael Richards was soon fired from the task when he was found guilty of racially abusing the royal steed.

                 After a lot of persuasion Prince Harry finally revealed that he intended to pick up a job for the purpose of knowing what ordinary people lived like, how life would be if one had to work to sustain it, and what sleeping under an ordinary non-golden roof felt like. Prince Charles grabbed this opportunity and used the latter part of the same argument to justify his affair with Camilla Parker. The Queen, ultimately, suggested that rather than pick up a job Harry should set himself upon a bunch of demanding, sophisticated missions which would help him get a break from the life of luxury, instill in him a sense of achievement and which would protect the royal heritage of never having worked a single day in life.

                    Prince Harry’s first mission was to milk a cow. He embarked on the mission armed with nothing but a heart full of hope and a glass tumbler. Prince Harry held the glass tumbler under the cow’s udder and requested her to donate some milk; when that failed he promised the cow that he would build her a nice luxurious shed if she complied; and when that too didn’t go as planned Prince Harry told the cow in a soft, cold voice, “Those are two very nice calves you have. It would be a shame if something were to happen to them, especially since you are a single mother.” Still no luck, still no milk. After fourteen minutes of trying he finally gave up and returned to the palace.

                    His second mission, that was meant to inculcate some normalcy into his life, was to repaint his home. This, Harry thought, was something he could do¾running a paintbrush up and down walls couldn’t be that hard. However, after three minutes into the task he quit when he realized that repainting one’s home was quite a difficult job especially when you lived in the Buckingham Palace. His next mission¾to clean up his room¾ was also abandoned after he was confused as to which of his three hundred and seventy two rooms he should start out with.

                   After various other failed missions the royal family broke the big news to Prince Harry¾he was going to Iraq to fight with the rest of the British soldiers. On hearing this he responded, keeping in tact the royal dignity, “Are you both bloody crazy?” However, the Queen and her son explained to Harry that he wouldn’t actually be going to Iraq; they would only be telling the world that he was dying to go there. Later, a security analysis would reveal a shocking finding that there was a chance Prince Harry could die if he went there. Thus, it would seem to everybody as if Harry was a patriot like the other soldiers but would still keep himself unharmed unlike the other soldiers. Prince Harry was impressed by the plan and promised his father and grandmother that he would never express an interest to toil again in his life. The Queen looked at her grandson, with tears in her eyes, and said, “We’re so proud of you, Harry.”

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